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ISSUE #38 Q & A
In every issue of FAZE MAGAZINE,
our readers bare their souls to
Ed & Red, Canada's high priest and priestess of morality, etiquette and, especially, common sense. Here are Ed & Red's unfettered and heartfelt replies.
Send your own questions to ed@faze.ca and hopefully Ed & Red will be able to answer you in an upcoming issue of FAZE.
Faze Reader:
I dated this guy for about six months, and—without going into crazy details— he smashed my heart into itty bitty pieces. Part of me knows that he’s no good and a player and blah, blah, blah. But knowing all that isn’t good enough. I WANT TO TOTALLY FORGET HE EVER EXISTED. WHAT IS THE BEST AND FASTEST WAY TO GET OVER SOMEONE?
ED:
The quickest way to get over someone is to stop thinking about how to get over them. Stop making him the focus of your thinking. You’ve got friends—thanks to Facebook, probably hundreds of friends you don’t even know—so spend time with them, do the things you did before you met him. The fact is that everyone dates a jerk at some point in their life; you just got yours over with early.
RED:
Do something that has nothing to do with dating. Hooking up with some other guy is a great way to keep digging up painful memories, but doing something that you’ve always wanted to do is a great way to get distance between you and the bad stuff. Whatever you do, don’t sit around moping.
Faze Reader:
“Nice guys finish last.” Do guys really think that this statement is true? I think it’s so stupid and it makes the good guys think they have to act all badboy and gives the real bad boys an excuse to act the way they do. I think we should start a movement, like, “GOOD BOYS ARE THE NEW BAD BOYS,” OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. WHADDYA THINK?
RED:
I think that’s a great idea! Bad boys annoy me to no end, and I think we need a nice guy renaissance. I’ve never understood the appeal of guys who are no good for you. I’m totally Team Jacob as opposed to Team Edward.
ED:
Uhhh…as an avatar of bad boys, let me object. First, I object to following a Twilight reference. But I also object to the notion of “good boys.” Usually someone is considered a “good boy” if they blindly follow all the rules and smile a lot. That isn’t a good buy, it’s a drone. And people think “good boys” are nice because they only tell you what you want to hear instead of being honest. It’s just camouflage for a coward or moron.
And then, there are two kinds of “bad boys”: a) the kind, like me, who generally reject the status quo and think for themselves, which makes us a sort of rebels and outlaws and b) self-absorbed jerks who treat everyone like crap. The latter isn’t a bad boy, he’s a jackass.
So, why don’t you try avoiding labels and just find someone who shares some interests and treats you well?
Faze Reader:
My BF of 3 months has a foot fetish. At first, I thought it was cute (when he was checking out my feet), but he’s known around school for meeting up with girls to worship their feet. HE SAYS IT NEVER GOES ANY FURTHER THAN THAT AND IT’S JUST A PART OF HIS PERSONALITY, BUT I HAVE A HARD TIME TRUSTING HIM. AM I OVERREACTING?
RED:
Erm… well… if he has a foot fetish, meeting girls to look at their feet is the same as meeting girls to look at their boobs. Some girls might be okay with that, but if you’re not, you’re not overreacting. Besides, if these meet-ups are things that the whole school knows about, he’s not being very discreet. Having a foot fetish is surprisingly common, but personally I think his behavior is bordering on disrespectful to you. Trust your instincts.
ED:
As a sock, I respectfully withdraw myself from this dialogue.
Faze Reader:
There’s this one guy at school that keeps getting picked on by the senior guys. He gets pushed around, shoved into lockers—pretty standard stuff. He’s really nice, but I guess he’s kind of geeky and maybe shouldn’t advertise how much he likes Star Wars. Everyone else sees what goes on, but doesn’t do anything. I TRIED TO HELP ONCE AND TELL THEM TO BACK OFF, BUT HE GOT MAD AT ME BECAUSE HE “DIDN’T NEED RESCUING FROM A GIRL.” IS THERE ANY OTHER WAY I CAN HELP HIM?
ED:
Yeah, whatever. The idiots who are pushing him in lockers because he’s a Star Wars geek are probably sports fans, who know everything about their team, players’ stats, sports trivia and probably wear team jerseys or paint their faces in team colours at sports events. Guess what? These people are GEEKS, TOO. Nobody should hide who they are in order to fit in with the crowd, because any crowd that makes you do that is a pack of morons you’re better off without.
As for this “don’t need help from a girl”…he’s just afraid that your help will give the bullies new reasons to pick on him. It’s jerky behavior, but he’s obviously feeling less of a man because of your help. So, let him get his butt kicked, see if he prefers that.
RED:
OMG it’s just like Harry Potter! … okay, I’m a big geek, too.
He (like Snape! Squee!) got mad because he was embarrassed, but bullying is totally wrong, period. There are two options for you, and neither of them is perfect. The first is the most risky: report the bullying to the principal, and tell them that you want to remain anonymous to protect this guy’s dignity. Problem is, some principals suck at Jedi mind tricks and aren’t good at keeping names secret.
The other option is to just be this poor geek’s friend. That will mean more than you know. Maybe even go with him to your local science fiction convention or pop culture expo. You’d be surprised how many other rabid Star Wars fans (like me) there are!
Look out for Ed's compilation CD!
Featuring "songs that don't suck"
(With tracks from Sum 41, Swollen Members, Gob, Bif Naked, LiveOnRelease and more)
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