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How Do I

by Alicia Petry, Fort Madison, Indiana, Age 13

How do I eat when I live in this guilt?
How do I sleep when I know it is all my fault?
How could I walk when I'm tumbling in my mind?
When I know my mistake could never be left behind

How could I talk when it just makes me think of it?
How could I have fun when I want myself to feel like shit?
How could I study when I have no idea what to do?
When I want the devil to come out, penalize me, saying boo

How could I ever do this to you?
One side of me regrets it
Another wants me to do (it again)
Should we be over?
And for me to be with him?
Or maybe I shouldn't tell you
And just live with my sin

How do I go on with life and just forget?
How could I be happy with my friends, and be playing with my pets?
How could I dream when I know they'll never again come true?
When I just wish I could be with both of you two!

How could I ever do this to you?
One side of me regrets it
Another wants me to do (it again)
Should we be over?
And for me to be with him?
Or maybe I shouldn't tell you
And live with my sin?

I think that I love you
I think that I do
But the other guy
I think I love him too
Oh do I love you both
Or do I love you guys at all?
What do I do?
Am I making sense
..At all?

How could I ever do this to you?
One side of me regrets it
Another wants me to do (it again)
Should we be over?
And for me to be with him?
Or maybe I shouldn't tell you
And live with my sin?

(for down below no musical background to end it off)
How do I breathe when I know there's no one else to blame?
How do I go through with life living in this shame?
I know now
You don't deserve me!!!